Cherry
Minibot
I'M BAAACCK!!!!!!!!!!!
Posts: 130
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Post by Cherry on Jul 30, 2010 12:47:45 GMT -5
Ladies and Gentlemen! Share with us some funny stories, true or not!
Espessially you Grimrod. You crack me up in your posts. I laugh for the next half hour! ;D
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Post by Grim Rod on Jul 30, 2010 13:19:25 GMT -5
Why thank you. I'll have to come up with one, but I'm sure it'll come to me soon. ;D
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Post by Firefly on Jul 30, 2010 16:16:27 GMT -5
Weeeell. I got a few up my sleeves. Let's see... First driving experience, for one? Or the first time my previous dog, Slick - now deceased - got a bath. Perhaps Firefly and one of her pranks, but that's my own creation, with a lot of Prowler's help (me only having known Transformers for a couple weeks at the time), so you might not get that one.
Ok, I'll go with the first driving experience first. Now, to get this, you have to get the layout of my house. I've told this story before, but left a couple details out so it'd be entertaining in a different telling as well... And I may leave a few details out here, too.
And I may be talking about a different one as well, but I'm pretty sure the first time I was going to Wal-mart... Or on the highway, but the wally world one's funnier.
Ok, so, I have an old house. About, say, 107 years old now? Maybe 108. We have a shared driveway with all three of our nieghbors, and two exits. It was icy outside, this being January 1st, the day after the permit laws changed here. Ok, so, I royally screwed up getting out of our branch of the driveway and into the shared one. I started the ignition just fine, but I put it into drive instead of reverse - mistake one. So I nearly rammed the wood pile with dad's little silver 2002 ford escort. So... After that was fixed - rather quickly, I panicked and hit the brakes pretty hard - we were driving backwards, out o the driveway. Mistake 2 - I was using the mirrors as opposed to looking behind me, and the drivers side mirror on this car is non-existent. So, after backing out a little, a panicked father shouts at me to stop, seeing as a) I was about to hit the pole that's in the nieghbors yard on the drivers side, and B) said neighbor was pulling into the driveway. Got corrected there, and here's mistake three - I pulled onto Main Street instead of Seventh Street. That was a pain. So, I'm waiting for an opening in traffic, and I let go of the brakes to idle forward a bit. Dad panics, mom too this time. Just what I needed. So I whip out, turning right onto the street, and immediately have to hit the breaks. Dad's head whipped forward, but mom was behind me. I was informed I should've just gone at that point. So I'm trying not to laugh OR panic, and I manage to run a red light... But no huge deal there. Ok, so, skip a couple of mistakes to safe time...
I finally manage to get into the wally world parking lot, and a BRIGHT YELLOW vehicle catches my eye. First comment? "Oo, is that a Hummer?" "Firefly! Keep your eyes on the road!" Another vehicle was coming almost straight for me. Oops. But, after correcting it, I simply commmented "Seriously, is that a Hummer?" "YES it's a Hummer. Now PARK. THE. CAR." Oops. Well, let's just cut short - again - and say I didn't get to drive home. And I forgot to move the seat back. I swear, it looked like dad was driving a clown car. It was... Hilarious. Yes, I cut a LOT of details out... But it was still entertaining. Now Rin doesn't trust my driving... But what can I say? Hehe.
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Post by Grim Rod on Jul 31, 2010 17:01:20 GMT -5
Clown car? Hmm... Well, this isn't my story, actually being a dream a friend had. The village down the road from mine has a small electronics shop. So, as we were debating the evil of clowns, he tells me about this dream: A car pulls up, andabout eleven clowns leap out with guns and such. They break into the shop, make off with a bunch of appliances and load up the car. Now, there's a little less room now, so a couple of clownsare tied onto the roof rack before the car takes off. One of many reasons I am not a huge fan of clowns.
If a clown happens to be reading this, I apologize.
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Post by Firefly on Jul 31, 2010 17:33:50 GMT -5
Oh, geez, guns... That reminds me of Rin, Alec and my plans for the Zombie invasion.
We were gonna hijack this kick-aft truck in the neighborhood, drive it THROUGH wal-mart, picking up as many cans goods as we could fit in the truck (And a can opener, I specifically pointed that out), and then drive to a gun shop, unload, get a couple awesome guns, and go back out to gather required objects to barricade our new fort in the gun shop. If one of us were to get bitten, we all agreed that either they'd die, or they'd turn and eat the other two. So, after building a fort in the gun shop and living there until it started stinking of zombie corpses, we'd move down to the dam by the river, set up there, and Alec would go fishing on occasion, while us girls'd have to find out how to cook the fish. Zombies would be blasted away with the guns, so that wasn't a problem. However, if and when we ran out of ammo, I - being the smallest, fittest, and most likely to survive if being chased - would run the truck up to another gun shop, and stock up on as much as I good get, leaving the scene in a big explosion. That lead to fun dreams that night, and Alec, idiot sexist boy, complaining that he'd be the only one there that'd put up a fight, being the only boy.
THEN came the analysis of the high school lunch room, if a Zombie were to get into the building. After much discussion on escape tactics and the average scare rating of the students... We decided we'd all die. The lunch ladies might escape, and maybe a couple office peeps, but that's it.
So the next class, in Biology, we were supposed to draw a picture of a food chain. And Rin, Alec, and I all happen to be in the same class there. So, Rin, being the class funny person, drew a picture of the following:
Zombie Cow --- Zombie --- Human --- Cow --- Grass.
And showed it to everybody nearby. I never thought a cow would look so vicious. Worst part? She turned it in. This was the class AFTER I turned in my biology report of the scientific modeling of Zombiism by a couple of college students...
Let's just say that entire school year was zombie obsessed, ending with Rin's simulated test of a Zombie virus, spread by touch. Yeah... That was a fun year.
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Cherry
Minibot
I'M BAAACCK!!!!!!!!!!!
Posts: 130
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Post by Cherry on Aug 4, 2010 23:03:05 GMT -5
lol
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Cherry
Minibot
I'M BAAACCK!!!!!!!!!!!
Posts: 130
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Post by Cherry on Aug 5, 2010 10:30:22 GMT -5
A bright yellow Hummer...hmmm....who does that remind me of? Ah, yes, Rachet in the new movie!
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Post by Firefly on Aug 5, 2010 10:32:00 GMT -5
Exactly what I thought when I saw it! xD
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Cherry
Minibot
I'M BAAACCK!!!!!!!!!!!
Posts: 130
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Post by Cherry on Aug 5, 2010 10:37:44 GMT -5
lol
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Post by Firefly on May 3, 2011 20:55:53 GMT -5
Seeing as this thread seems to have died, it must be time for a new story... And I'm kind of procrastinating on my English Final, so... I'll tell a story about school to get me in a school mood. Right. It was a dreadfully rainy day outside of the building that day, and yesterday I had just gotten back from a trip to see my therapist. Unbeknownst to me, it was to be my last trip there, but that isn't important to the story. Basically, I was feeling oober depressed and even more stressed by recent events, and the weather, as rain always seems to do, sucked the energy out of the school. The sky lights were dark, the windows showed gloom and the doom of a wet walk home. The unbearable cold seeped into the building as well, it having been during the winter, no sign of snow coming except for the frigid cold.
Classes came and passed, gossip and rumors zipped through the building, homework was piled onto students who, most of which, were already behind in several classes... Basically, the day looked as though it would never end.
First Intro to Physics - before the teacher came back to teach the second half of the year, while we still had the sub that taught better than she did. Then English, then Young Adult Lit - that was the relax class, or, depending on the day, try-not-to-cry because you can relate too well to the characters class. Algebra Two next - this is the room I always nearly fall asleep in because the teacher keeps the lights dim, and if you look at the room just right it's all psychedelico because of the twirly things hanging from the ceiling. After that, the wake-up class, history - at this point I'm about to give up. Then Culinary, where I usually yell at at least one person, if not two. Finally, where the story takes place - Spanish class.
Spanish class is the class where I cracked. I was stressed, depressed, upset, out of patience, and really, really in need of a nap. No, I wasn't angry at anybody... Just... Really... Slap happy, I guess. We had a sub, because Poppe was taking one of her now-but-not-then famous days off. This was the day in which she started to become slightly famous for them.
I sat - and now sit - at a table with two other girls who I commonly speak with, and a pretty sexist guy. We've moved tables, but not seating arrangements, except for one week when Poppe got really frustrated about how we were American students, and how we were supposed to be receiving some of the best education in the world or what-not... She goes off on that tangent pretty often. Personally, due to a little bit of research, I'm disinclined to believe her.
Anyway, that's off topic. In the middle of that day's assignment, Erin looked at me - and I mean really looked at me, as though contemplating whether or not she should tell me something. I, like a good little American student (eye-roll, anybody?), was doing my work, struggling with the preterite form conjugations of irregular verbs, when she finally speaks up.
"So... Where do you think Poppe goes when she's not here? After all, she's gone often enough that there has to be some story behind it." Slowly, carefully, I put my pencil down so that it lined up perfectly with the edge of the paper (Yes, I've got minor OCD...), before looking at Erin, a thoughtful, albeit tired expression on my face.
"Maybe... Maybe she's actually got a secret job... And she teaches as a cover up!" A slightly off-centered grin plastered itself onto my face eyes watering slightly from the sudden change in facial expression. This was easily ignored.
" Maybe... She's out hunting." Erin suggested, her tone thoughtful.
"You're right, she's got all those hunting dogs and horses... And there's that one article in that magazine that she's so proud of... But what would she be hunting? Wait, don't answer that! It's the CHUPACABRA!" by the end, I was almost shouting - luckily, Spanish class is always loud enough that you can generally get away with it.
Erin busted up laughing, and I have to admit to some very off-sounding laughing coming from myself as well. Yes, definitely slap-happy. Erin replied after a moment, though. "Not only does she hunt the Chupacabra, but she works for a super-secret Mexican society specifically oriented on hunting down folk tale monsters and ghosts and getting rid of them!" Not Done yet!
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